My Prayer

Lord my heavenly father,

I shall offer you my gratitude, since you have showed great enlightenment to me .

We are nothing but your flawed kids running around the earth. You can hear me, you know my name and you called me often.

I attended the workshop of active listening this morning. Witnessing my schoolmates have great passion on the subject they are learning or the project they are running, I realized you have  plant a valuable seed in every person's heart. I know those wishes are as strong as mine, and I can notice they are struggling, self-doubting just like I do all the time. My passion is in media. But the boy want to be a teacher get critical. He said nothing was memorable about myself introduction. It sounds very veg.
What are the fact that is true between me and media？ I have learned electronic piano since 4 years old. I was the one of six in the city who obtain highest degree in music theory. And I got a full mark at that time. I won the first prize of TV emcee talent show national wide when I was 16. Hosted Mid-Autumn Festival of NUS during the first year I came to Singapore. I love singing still. Have be trained in Music Forest, and write a song for R at the end of the course. Dancing, I was involved in Jazztitude advanced beginner. Those are the connections I can think of that I have with arts and performance.

I know the only thing that stopped me from identify myself as an artist is that I am rational and intellectual as well. I know where the power come from. Never from artists but politician and economists. Lord I am too thirsty about power and material. Forgive me, forgive me that I am bothered by those concerns and refused your offering.

You are offering me a great life.

When I talked to my parents last night, with the NBC logo pillow. My entire person just lighted up. I am cheerfully talking about my dreams, my interpretation of the world and how can I contribute to it. I said I am so interested in music and film, even tho I am still on the way. I am not an genius. I am just a normal girl with a true love for art.

 If it going to be a challenging journey, let it be. I am not afraid. Without a music or song what are we. What can we be.

Ashton, my previews vocal teacher starts publish his original on Facebook. I am so glad of him that he finally make this step and begin to build his own dream.

Later today I begin to learn E-mail campaign. Sending those beautiful newsletters is a great joy for me.
Before I went to bed,  I watched a video online about a murder case in Dongyuan, China. It was so touching that I almost burst into tears. I have not cried for years I think. It is getting harder for me to be moved by videos and episodes. The video was made by the boyfriend of the girl who had been murdered. Every image is an expression of love and missing. Love, pure love, true love is so beautiful. And I finally realized it is all the wicked mind that keep us from growing.

So today you reveal yourself to me in a new level. I admire you Lord.
And I miss him.

Good night.